Grief is a profound, often overwhelming experience that affects us emotionally, physically and mentally. In the search for healing, many of us turn to the restorative power of nature. We know that many people get great comfort from the ritual of visiting their loved one’s final resting place. Our nature-rich Parks honour the deceased while providing tranquil spaces teeming with richly diverse flora and fauna for the living to reflect on precious memories.
Forest bathing is a therapeutic practice rooted in the simplicity of being surrounded by the tranquility of a forest environment. If you’ve never heard of it before, this blog covers everything you need to know about how forest bathing help you navigate the difficult journey of grief and how to incorporate it the next time you visit a GreenAcres Living Memorial Park.
What is forest bathing?
Known in Japan as Shinrin yoku, forest bathing is an ancient Japanese practice of relaxation that involves being surrounded by the forest and engaging all the senses to experience nature’s healing power. Though the name might sound unfamiliar, forest bathing is a simple act that’s all about slowing down and mindfully connecting with the forest’s sights, sounds, smells, and textures.
As more people look to nature for healing during tough times, forest bathing offers an escape from grief and promotes harmony between the mind, body and nature.
What are the benefits of forest bathing for grief?
Scientific studies have shown that forest bathing can significantly reduce stress, boost mood and enhance overall wellbeing. The benefits also extend beyond mental health, contributing to improved cardiovascular health and a strengthened immune system.
Nature offers a calm and serene sanctuary for those dealing with grief, too. Being in nature can’t cure grief, but it can help with recovery by providing you with the solitude you need to come to terms with your feelings. Being outdoors in the beauty of a nature-rich GreenAcres Living Memorial Park lets you disconnect from your everyday life and take a few moments to connect with your loved one without disruption or distraction.
How to practice forest bathing in a GreenAcres Living Memorial Park
GreenAcres offers the perfect setting for forest bathing, allowing you to immerse yourself in the natural beauty and tranquility of our glorious woodland, shady glades and rich variety of flora and fauna. Here’s how you can practice forest bathing the next time you visit a GreenAcres Living Memorial Park:
Choose a quiet time to visit
Visit one of our Parks during a quieter time, such as early morning or late afternoon, to ensure a peaceful atmosphere that allows you to reflect on precious memories.
Disconnect from distractions
Forest bathing is a time to disconnect from the outside world and connect deeply with nature, so turn your phone on silent and turn off any other electronic devices to avoid distraction.
Begin with slow, mindful movement
Start your journey with a slow, mindful walk through the Park’s peaceful trails. Focus on each step, feeling the earth beneath your feet while letting the natural rhythm guide you.
Engage all your senses
Open your senses to the woodland. Notice the vibrant greens of the leaves, the scent of the flowers, the sound of wind rustling through the trees, and the textures you feel as you brush past plants or touch tree bark.
Find a comforting spot to rest
Sit down and immerse yourself in the tranquility of your surroundings by choosing a spot that feels comfortable for you. This could be a quiet bench, a soft patch of grass or a resting spot beside your loved one’s memorial. When you find the right location, try to stop your mind from wandering too far from the moment.
Practice deep, healing breaths
Focus on your breathing. Inhale deeply and draw in the fresh air before slowly exhaling to release your sorrow and stress. Let each breath help you find a sense of calm and balance.
Allow your emotions to flow
Give yourself permission to feel and express your grief. Whether through tears, silent contemplation or spoken words, let the forest be a safe space for your emotions.
Reflect and write down your feelings
You might find comfort in bringing a journal with you to document your thoughts and feelings in the moment. Writing can be a powerful way to process grief and help you understand your journey more clearly.
End your forest bathing session with gratitude
End your forest bathing session by acknowledging the support and peace the natural surroundings have offered you. Express gratitude for the moments of serenity and reflection.
If you find comfort from forest bathing, you can make it a part of your routine whenever you need solace when loved ones are no longer around.
GreenAcres Living Memorial Parks provide so much more than a prestigious funeral, burial and memorial venue. Set amidst acres of woodland, meadowland and beautifully manicured parkland, our Parks are the perfect place for you to say your goodbyes and reflect on precious memories time and time again.
If you’re looking for a tranquil environment where you can pay tribute to the person who’s died Contact Us and speak to a member of our friendly team.
Christmas is a time of joy, celebration and spending time with loved ones. But for those dealing with a loss, it’s a time tinged with sadness. Christmas can bring grief to the forefront, serving as a painful reminder of the people who are no longer with us. Even if the death occurred many years ago, it’s important to understand how to support someone through their grief at Christmas so that they know they have someone to lean on should they need a friendly ear.
This blog will give you advice on what to say and what to do to help those who struggle with their grief at Christmas.
Don’t avoid speaking about Christmas
It’s natural to avoid speaking about Christmas if you don’t know how to approach the subject. But this can make the person who’s grieving feel more alone. Instead, it’s better to acknowledge that it will be a difficult time and that you’re always there for the person if they need support.
If you plan to send a Christmas card, write a message from the heart. Name the person who died and share a memory to help ease the pain. You may even raise a smile.
Reach out
While you’ve undoubtedly got a million things to think about before Christmas day, set aside some time to reach out to your friend or relative. A simple text or phone call can go a long way in making them feel less isolated when everyone around them is busy gearing up for the big day. Ask them how they’re feeling and allow them to speak about their loss if they feel up to it.
Try not to leave it too long in between texts. It’s easy to read a message and forget about it, intending to reply when you’re less busy. But keep the conversation going as long as your friend or family member needs.
Listen without interrupting
Those dealing with grief often find it hard to open up during the Christmas period. When everyone else is having fun going to Christmas parties and listening to festive music, they keep feelings bottled up to avoid bringing the mood down. Unfortunately, this ends up leaving their grief feeling far worse.
It’s important to offer your friend or relative the opportunity to get their emotions out. Allow the person grieving to speak about their feelings by creating a safe space for them to open up as honestly as they want to. Don’t interrupt, make comparisons or offer unwarranted advice. Simply make a cup of tea, provide the mince pies and lend a tentative ear.
Extend an invitation but support their choice
Christmas can be a lonely time for those suffering a loss. While your friend or family member may not be up for the festivities this year, extend an invitation so they know they’re welcome. It may be that they’d rather be on their own, but they’re bound to appreciate the thoughtful gesture, nonetheless. Likewise, if they choose to decline, respect their decision and try again the following year.
Christmas often loses its shine after a loss – at least in the immediate aftermath. Many people prefer to treat the 25th of December like any other day while they try to cope with their grief.
Offer help
If your friend or relative chooses to celebrate Christmas, offer to help them wrap gifts, prepare food or pick up last-minute stocking fillers. When people struggle, they tend to carry on regardless. The offer of help could be the thing they need to get through the festive period intact. Even if they don’t take you up on it, it’s a kind and thoughtful thing to do.
Keep the conversation going after Christmas
Grief is ongoing. Even when Christmas is over and done with, your friend or relative still has to deal with the tidal wave of emotions as time goes on. Remember to keep checking in on them beyond Christmas. It’s true that the festive period can be the most painful time, but grief is far from linear. They will appreciate your love and support, regardless of the season.
If you’re suffering from grief this Christmas or you know someone who is, you’re welcome to join us on 11 and 15 December at your local GreenAcres Park for our Christmas Remembrance Service. Whether this is your first Christmas without this special person or the time of year that makes the memories that little bit harder, our Christmas Remembrance Service can be a lovely way to spend time reflecting.
It may also help to connect with others who have lost someone too. We have a wonderful nurturing community through our GreenAcres Bereavement Support Groups, which run once a month in every Park; please see our events page for more information. Find out more by visiting the events page on our website.
Losing your mother or a motherly figure can be one of the most emotional and painful experiences you’ll ever go through.
This blog will guide you through a myriad of emotions you may be experiencing and will provide useful tips on how to support children grieving the loss of a mother.
Missing your Mum on special occasions
If you are struggling with grief of losing your mother or a motherly figure, special occasions such as Mother’s Day, Christmas, Birthday’s or anniversaries can be challenging. Below we’ve compiled five useful tips to help you deal with loss.
Be kind to yourself – There are five stages of grief from denial to acceptance and you may experience each stage at different times. Understanding these different stages will help you to realise that all the strange feelings you are feeling are perfectly normal.
Talk to your loved ones or friends – By sharing your fondest memories and stories of your mother with someone, can help keep their memory alive and bring some sense of comfort.
Do an activity your mum would love – From cooking her favourite meal, baking a cake, a spot of gardening or even watching one of her favourite TV shows/ Films.
Visit their grave or memorial spot – Taking the time to visit your mother’s grave or memorial spot can help bring you some comfort and time to reflect.
Practice self-care – Take the day to love and nurture yourself. Run yourself a hot bath, practise yoga, sing, dance, do things that make you smile.
Ask for help – Losing a parent or loved one can be a difficult process, there is no shame in asking for help or extra support if you feel like you are struggling. It maybe helpful to speak to someone outside of your family and friend circle such as your GP or a bereavement specialist.
NHS approved, Cruse Bereavement Care offers a wide range of support, advice and information to children, young people and adults when someone dies.
Supporting grieving children
For a child who has recently suffered the loss of a mother or motherly figure, the feelings of grief can feel confusing and frustrating.
Be patient – Children process and express grief differently from adults. Children may go from playing and laughing one minute to floods of tears the next. Be patient with them and let them know that it is ok to feel this way.
Consistency is key – Try to maintain household routines such as mealtimes, bedtimes etc. as much as possible. Structure and consistency are important to a child as they will help to create a sense of security.
Answer their questions – Naturally, children ask a lot of questions and this is no different when it comes to death. Answering any questions children might have about death and why it happens, will help give them a better understanding as to why they are experiencing certain emotions. If you find some questions too difficult to answer, there are many children’s books available that can help explain death in a ‘child friendly’ manner. You can find a list of over 60 children’s books on the topic of death and grief here.
Create a ‘Memory Box’ – Filling a box with photos, keepsakes and other special items is a great activity to do with children to help them feel more connected to a lost one. It is also a tangible item that children can keep going back to when they are feeling sad. https://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Memory-Box
If you are concerned that your child is struggling to cope or have noticed any unusual behavioural changes, you can seek further help and advice from your GP or organisations like Child Bereavement UK and Hope Again.
Prioritising your health and wellbeing
It can be difficult to think of anything else when dealing with grief, but taking some time to focus on the importance of your health and wellbeing can be beneficial, and can even help clear your mind.
Heart disease, Alzheimer’s, Cancer and other non-communicable diseases (NCDs) are the most common cause of death and disability in women worldwide.
Losing a loved one to a disease such as cancer can spark worry into your own health and wellbeing. However, there are steps you can take to help reduce your risks of cancer:
Tobacco use – Tobacco use is the single largest preventable cause of death worldwide and is the leading cause of over 7 million deaths per year. Quitting at any age can make a huge difference, increasing your life expectancy and improving your quality of life.
Physical Activity – Maintaining a healthy weight and making physical activity part of your everyday life can help reduce your risks of cancer and other health problems, such as heart disease and diabetes.
Alcohol – By reducing and limiting how much you drink, can reduce your risk of 7 cancers including breast, mouth and bowel cancers.
If you are worried about cancer in your family – If you have recently lost your mother or another strong female figure in your family to cancer and are worried if it could be hereditary, the Ovarian Cancer Action website offers a ‘Hereditary Cancer Risk Tool’ which can help to assess your risks of developing certain cancers.
Early detection saves lives – There are many different types of cancers, and symptoms are varied, however, the earlier cancer is detected the higher the chance that it can be successfully treated.
If you are concerned about your health or have experienced any unusual symptoms or changes in your body, don’t be afraid to contact your doctor immediately.
References:
https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/cancer
https://www.cancerresearchuk.org/about-cancer/causes-of-cancer/alcohol-and-cancer
https://www.worldcancerday.org/
https://waltercarter.com.au/blog/lost-without-her-missing-your-mum-on-mothers-day
https://www.childbereavementuk.org/supporting-bereaved-children-and-young-people
Taking place from 9-15th October, Baby Loss Awareness Week is a time to raise awareness of pregnancy and baby loss. Among those affected are children who may have lost a much loved or much hoped-for sibling.
Children and young people grieve just as deeply as adults, but they show it in different ways. When your baby dies, it can feel difficult to know how to tell your child and support them.
We’re here to support you, so this blog will help you talk to children about grief and encourage them to share their feelings. Read on for more information.
Understanding how children may feel
After the death of a sibling, a child may feel a range of emotions, from sadness and anger to confusion and worry. They may also feel concerned that they or another family member might die.
Younger children often move in and out of their grief very rapidly, sometimes seeming sad and then suddenly wanting to play. This ‘puddle jumping’ is normal and is a young child’s way of coping with difficult emotions.
Children under five may show their distress with disrupted sleep, altered appetite and less interest in play. There may be a regression in skills such as language or toilet training, or they might become anxious about the dark when going to bed.
‘Magical thinking’ is a characteristic of primary age children meaning that they may believe their thoughts and actions caused someone to die or that somehow, they can make the person come back. Answering questions and giving age-appropriate information is key to supporting children at this age.
Teenagers may become withdrawn and ‘act out’ their distress through behaviours. Keeping to the usual boundaries of acceptable behaviour can be reassuring for bereaved young people and give them a sense of security when everything else might feel out of control.
As well as changes in behaviour, some children may react physically with headaches, stomach aches, anxiety, sleep problems and appetite loss.
With support from family, most children will not need professional help. However, if you have any concerns, you may find it helpful to talk to your GP or to seek help from a bereavement group.
Explain what has happened
It’s important to tell your child that your baby has died as soon as possible in a safe, comfortable and familiar environment. If telling your child feels overwhelming for you, enlist someone close to you to help break the news. Don’t be afraid to tell your child that you’re feeling upset and finding it hard to talk. It’s best to be as open and honest as possible.
How much detail you choose to share depends on your child’s age and understanding. Let your instincts guide you and if you’re not sure what to say, ask your child what they know so that you can gauge their level of understanding, allowing them to steer the conversation if they feel confident enough. They’re likely to have questions, so try to answer them as best you can, or they may fill the gaps with scary or anxious thoughts.
Child Bereavement UK has resources that can help you find the right words, including telling a child someone has died and a short guidance film.
Use simple language
Try to use simple language that is appropriate to your child’s age and understanding. Avoid using euphemisms such as ‘sleeping’ which can suggest your baby will wake, or ‘lost’ which suggests they can be found. Instead, use real words such as ‘dead’ and ‘died’. Child Bereavement UK suggests saying the following to a young child if a baby is stillborn, for instance: ‘While still inside mummy’s tummy our baby died before they were born, which is very sad.’
Depending on how old your child is, you may have to explain what has happened repeatedly as their understanding develops. As they get older and their understanding grows, a child may revisit their grief and have additional questions and concerns.
Show your emotions
Don’t be afraid to show your emotions in front of your child. It’s natural to want to put a brave face on, but it’s important to show that crying is a normal reaction to grief. Reassure your child that you’re not crying because of them or something they’ve done. By sharing your feelings with your child, you can demonstrate that it’s OK to show sadness. If you are open, your child will feel able to share their emotions too.
Encourage your child to grieve
Finding ways to remember their baby brother or sister is an important part of the grieving process. Encourage them to draw pictures, make a memory box or write a letter to their sibling. These small things can help them maintain a connection with their sibling and gives them a chance to say goodbye. Child Bereavement UK’s animation, Remembering someone special who has died, suggests ways children and young people can remember someone important to them who has died.
A very young child, toddler, or even a baby can go to a funeral with the rest of the family. Although they may not understand what is happening at the time, when they are older, they will appreciate that they were a part of this important event along with everyone else. Ask someone close to your child to join you in case your child gets upset or becomes restless and wants to go out. It may be hard to have to deal with your own grief and theirs.
Child Bereavement UK has created two animations which can help you prepare a child for a funeral – Explaining funerals to children -what happens at a burial? and Explaining funerals to children- what happens at a cremation?
Maintain a routine
Children feel safe and comforted by following a routine. While your days may look slightly different, if possible, try to keep certain things the same – like a daily bath, a trip to the park or a bedtime story. Maintaining familiarity is reassuring for children – especially at a younger age. If you need to be away for any time, let your child know for how long and who will be looking after them.
Ask for help
Don’t be afraid to ask a loved one for help. For example, a grandparent or friend may be able to take your children to school, giving you some time and space to grieve and to try to find time to look after yourself.
There are also many charities and support groups that you can turn to. For example, Child Bereavement UK provides confidential support, information and guidance to individuals, families and professionals throughout the UK. The support team is available to respond to calls, Live Chat or email from 9am – 5pm, Monday to Friday (except bank holidays). Call 0800 02 888 40 or email [email protected]. For Live Chat, click here.
Join us for our Baby Loss Service
Now in its 21st year, Baby Loss Awareness Week is a wonderful opportunity to bring our community together and give everyone touched by the loss of a baby a safe and supportive space to share their experiences and feel they are not alone. Join us and other families for our special service on October 15th and light a candle in memory of all babies that have gone too soon. Please join us after the service for tea and cake. Everyone is welcome!
Services will be taking place in Chiltern, Colney, Epping Forest and Kemnal Park. Book onto a service here.
Visit Child Bereavement UK’s website for more information and guidance on supporting a child or young person when a baby dies.