As more and more people begin to talk more openly about death, funerals are starting to look different. Instead of the solemn ceremonies most of us are used to, living funerals are becoming a more popular trend. That’s because they give family and friends the chance to say goodbye to their loved ones before they die, while providing the person being celebrated the opportunity to reflect on their life surrounded by the people closest to them. 

If you’ve never heard of a living funeral before, you’re not alone. We’ve created this blog post to explain more about pre-funeral ceremonies and why you might consider having one. 

What is a living funeral? 

Living funerals – or pre-funeral ceremonies as they’re also known – are held for a living person who is aware of their impending death. They’re similar to traditional funerals; only the person being remembered is very much alive during the celebration.  

Why choose a living funeral? 

While a pre-funeral ceremony isn’t the right choice for everyone, they offer those who know they’re going to die the chance to have a final celebration with their friends and family. Some people choose to have a living funeral because it ensures their final wishes are met. In many cases, instead of loved ones being responsible for funeral arrangements, the person being remembered has complete control – right down to the music, theme and dress code. But there’s also the benefit of having friends and family around to help plan the ceremony if you need support. 

Having a funeral before the person dies takes the stress of paying for and arranging a funeral away from those left behind, giving them time and space to grieve for their loved one once they’re gone. Pre-funeral ceremonies can also provide friends and family with closure – particularly if their loved one has a terminal illness.  

Some people take comfort in sharing memories and celebrating their loved one’s life while they’re still alive and well enough to enjoy their final send-off.  

Why are living funerals so popular?  

The idea of a living funeral first started in Japan in the mid-90s. Known as seizenso – which literally translates to “funeral while alive” – living funerals were born out of the idea that the younger generations were being burdened by the stress of planning their elders’ funerals.  

But even though living funerals aren’t a new idea, they’ve recently been made more popular after comedian Dawn French reprised her popular role as The Vicar of Dibley to deliver a eulogy at her friend Kris Hallenga’s living funeral. According to an article in The Daily Express, Kris, who’s living with stage-four cancer, arranged her “FUNeral” so she could be “drunk on love and gratitude” while celebrating her life with her loved ones. 

What to consider when planning a living funeral 

Planning a living funeral is similar to planning a party and is slightly easier than traditional funeral planning because you don’t need to worry about the burial, coffin or cremation. One of the first things to consider is the location of your living funeral. Here are some ideas: 

There are also the finer elements of funeral planning to think about, such as: 

Now that you know more about a living funeral, you might have some idea about whether a pre-funeral ceremony is the right choice for you or not. But whether you choose to have a living funeral or not, there are many advantages to pre-planning your funeral.  

Not only does thinking ahead give you time to think about important decisions, but pre-planning means you can have the ceremony exactly as you want it. It can also relieve your loved ones from the burden of having to make difficult decisions once you’re gone. Find out more about the benefits in our guide to planning your funeral before you die.  

Grief is a profound, often overwhelming experience that affects us emotionally, physically and mentally. In the search for healing, many of us turn to the restorative power of nature. We know that many people get great comfort from the ritual of visiting their loved one’s final resting place. Our nature-rich Parks honour the deceased while providing tranquil spaces teeming with richly diverse flora and fauna for the living to reflect on precious memories.  

Forest bathing is a therapeutic practice rooted in the simplicity of being surrounded by the tranquility of a forest environment. If you’ve never heard of it before, this blog covers everything you need to know about how forest bathing help you navigate the difficult journey of grief and how to incorporate it the next time you visit a GreenAcres Living Memorial Park. 

What is forest bathing? 

Known in Japan as Shinrin yoku, forest bathing is an ancient Japanese practice of relaxation that involves being surrounded by the forest and engaging all the senses to experience nature’s healing power. Though the name might sound unfamiliar, forest bathing is a simple act that’s all about slowing down and mindfully connecting with the forest’s sights, sounds, smells, and textures.  

As more people look to nature for healing during tough times, forest bathing offers an escape from grief and promotes harmony between the mind, body and nature.   

What are the benefits of forest bathing for grief? 

Scientific studies have shown that forest bathing can significantly reduce stress, boost mood and enhance overall wellbeing. The benefits also extend beyond mental health, contributing to improved cardiovascular health and a strengthened immune system. 

Nature offers a calm and serene sanctuary for those dealing with grief, too. Being in nature can’t cure grief, but it can help with recovery by providing you with the solitude you need to come to terms with your feelings. Being outdoors in the beauty of a nature-rich GreenAcres Living Memorial Park lets you disconnect from your everyday life and take a few moments to connect with your loved one without disruption or distraction.  

How to practice forest bathing in a GreenAcres Living Memorial Park 

GreenAcres offers the perfect setting for forest bathing, allowing you to immerse yourself in the natural beauty and tranquility of our glorious woodland, shady glades and rich variety of flora and fauna. Here’s how you can practice forest bathing the next time you visit a GreenAcres Living Memorial Park: 

Choose a quiet time to visit 

Visit one of our Parks during a quieter time, such as early morning or late afternoon, to ensure a peaceful atmosphere that allows you to reflect on precious memories.  

Disconnect from distractions 

Forest bathing is a time to disconnect from the outside world and connect deeply with nature, so turn your phone on silent and turn off any other electronic devices to avoid distraction. 

Begin with slow, mindful movement 

Start your journey with a slow, mindful walk through the Park’s peaceful trails. Focus on each step, feeling the earth beneath your feet while letting the natural rhythm guide you. 

Engage all your senses 

Open your senses to the woodland. Notice the vibrant greens of the leaves, the scent of the flowers, the sound of wind rustling through the trees, and the textures you feel as you brush past plants or touch tree bark. 

Find a comforting spot to rest 

Sit down and immerse yourself in the tranquility of your surroundings by choosing a spot that feels comfortable for you. This could be a quiet bench, a soft patch of grass or a resting spot beside your loved one’s memorial. When you find the right location, try to stop your mind from wandering too far from the moment.  

Practice deep, healing breaths 

Focus on your breathing. Inhale deeply and draw in the fresh air before slowly exhaling to release your sorrow and stress. Let each breath help you find a sense of calm and balance. 

Allow your emotions to flow 

Give yourself permission to feel and express your grief. Whether through tears, silent contemplation or spoken words, let the forest be a safe space for your emotions. 

Reflect and write down your feelings 

You might find comfort in bringing a journal with you to document your thoughts and feelings in the moment. Writing can be a powerful way to process grief and help you understand your journey more clearly. 

End your forest bathing session with gratitude 

End your forest bathing session by acknowledging the support and peace the natural surroundings have offered you. Express gratitude for the moments of serenity and reflection. 

If you find comfort from forest bathing, you can make it a part of your routine whenever you need solace when loved ones are no longer around.  

GreenAcres Living Memorial Parks provide so much more than a prestigious funeral, burial and memorial venue. Set amidst acres of woodland, meadowland and beautifully manicured parkland, our Parks are the perfect place for you to say your goodbyes and reflect on precious memories time and time again.  

If you’re looking for a tranquil environment where you can pay tribute to the person who’s died Contact Us and speak to a member of our friendly team.

Gone are the days when funerals meant mourners wore dark colours, sang hymns and were led by a religious official in a place of worship. Today, funerals are becoming a more personal affair, with the deceased having a much bigger say in what they want to happen at their funeral before they die.  

Tradition isn’t for everyone. Whether you’re planning your own funeral or organising a ceremony for someone you love, here are some ways you can make it more personal to reflect the life that was lived.  

Ask mourners to wear bright colours 

One of the most common ways to personalise a funeral is to ask mourners to wear bright colours. Bright colours are typically seen as a celebration of life, bringing comfort to those who are mourning and feeling anxious about the ceremony. 

According to a study by YouGov in 2016, only 22% of people see black funeral attire as a requirement at funerals, with a further 29% believing any colour is acceptable. You may want to specify a specific shade – perhaps your loved one’s favourite colour. Or you could even suggest that mourners wear the colours of the football team your loved one supported in life. Sometimes ‘anything but black’ is enough of a steer to help people decide what to wear.  

One of our Park Managers shared this heart-warming story with us about one of the funerals held in their Park: 

“One that sticks out for me at Chiltern is a lady who had a service and burial. She was super flamboyant and extremely colourful in all aspects of her life – from how she dressed to the colour of her hair. All the guests were dressed in many different colours. Her daughter also wanted to do something special and found a beautiful multi-coloured horse and carriage to take her mum to her final resting place. It was such a beautiful service, and it was an honour to help the family.” 

Choose a unique coffin  

You can make a coffin as unique as you’d like it to be. From bright colours and bespoke themes to prints and sporting crests, there’s no end to the options available to you.  

There are picture coffins to consider, too. These are coffins adorned with a particular picture that takes inspiration from the deceased’s favourite places, hobbies, or sports. You can even have their favourite photograph printed onto the coffin, serving as a celebration of their life long after they’re gone.  

Create a unique floral display 

Celebrate your loved one’s passions by creating a unique floral display. You could create an open book floral arrangement as a tribute to a bookworm, or have the flowers arranged as an instrument to celebrate a musician. If your loved one was a keen gardener, why not include their favourite flowers and plants from their own garden?  

No idea is too difficult for the right florist. Talk to a local funeral florist about your ideas, and they’ll find a way to bring them to life.  

Have a civil ceremony led by a celebrant or humanist 

Funerals led by a celebrant or humanist are now very popular. Humanist ceremonies tend to be non-religious, which is one of the main reasons why people choose to have one. Civil celebrants tailor the service entirely to the deceased’s wishes, allowing them to have as much or as little religious content as they like. Both types of ceremony can be spiritual and are fully flexible to represent the life you or your loved one lived.  

Use alternative transport to a hearse 

A traditional hearse is most widely used to carry a coffin to a funeral, but there are several companies in the UK – like Morton’s Funeral Hire , TCribb and Bennetts Funeral Directors – that specialise in transforming unique modes of transport into hearses with enough space to hold a coffin. Instead of a classic hearse, you could choose a: 

You could even choose a traditional horse-drawn glass hearse, giving your loved one the magical send-off they deserve. Speak to your local funeral director to discuss your requirements in detail and see what’s possible.

Add personal finishing touches 

Here are some finishing touches you might want to consider to make a funeral more personal:  

You could also decorate the Service Hall with things special to your loved one – like this family did at one of our Parks: 

“We had a burial service for a lady in her 90s who was well known in Grayshott village for cycling around on her tricycle and being very active in the area. She was also a great quilter, and her family brought all her quilts and bunting which we used to decorate the hall. Her famous tricycle also played a part! Her service was a wonderful celebration of her life and the family were very pleased that it was so personal and special.” 

If you’d like to arrange a more personal funeral for yourself or a loved one, speak to a friendly and knowledgeable member of the GreenAcres team and we’ll do everything we can to accommodate your wishes.  

Children deal with loss in many different ways. Particularly since the death of Her Majesty the Queen and the war in Ukraine, children of all ages have been asking more questions about bereavement and what happens after someone dies.

Though it’s natural to worry about saying the wrong thing, speaking to children about their thoughts and feelings after the death of a loved one is an important thing to do. After all, they’re just as affected by death as we are. Plus, children’s imaginations run wild, causing unwarranted stress and fear.

You may not know where to begin – and that’s okay. This blog will help you navigate the process and show you how to talk to children about grief.

Be honest about what has happened

The first – and arguably most important – step is to explain what happened honestly and clearly. Use plain language the children can understand. For example, it’s better to say, ‘someone has died’ rather than ‘passed away’ or ‘gone to sleep’. The latter will only confuse them.

Depending on the children’s age, creating stories to help them relate to the situation may help. During this time, let them ask as many questions as they need. It’s important that you answer truthfully, but try not to overburden them with information. Giving short, to-the-point answers will help them process what’s happened.

Remember, the conversation about death is an ongoing one. Try to be as willing as possible to answer questions when they have them. Children ask questions at the most random times, but accommodate them as best you can.

Offer reassurance

After experiencing a death, children often worry about their friends and family dying. While you can’t make promises about the future, you can reassure them that they’re loved and will always have someone to care for them should the worst happen.

It’s best not to go into too much detail about this. As we’ve mentioned, children’s imaginations often get the better of them, so be careful not to put scary ideas into their heads. Instead, shower the children with love and affection and spend time doing fun things with them – like painting and baking – to take their minds off their worries.

Don’t hide your feelings

Children are incredibly observant and will pick up on your feelings, even if you’re careful not to show them. Instead of hiding that you’re sad, let them see your emotions. That way, they’ll feel like they can openly share theirs without feeling suppressed. They’ll also develop a healthy relationship with death moving forward.

Give your child space to play

While talking about death is good for a child’s development, it can be an intense and upsetting experience. Children need their own space to partake in normal activities – either alone or with friends. Grief affects children differently, so don’t be alarmed if yours act like nothing’s happened. Your child’s grieving, even if it doesn’t seem like it.

Help them express their grief

Not all children like to talk about their feelings. Some find drawing or writing about how they feel more cathartic. If your child is finding it hard to talk about death, encourage them to express their grief creatively instead.

They might want to write a poem or letter to the person who’s died. Or they may prefer to paint or draw a tribute to a loved one. Creating a memory box can also help children express grief. Fill it with pictures, letters, stories and anything that reminds them of the person who’s passed away.

Worry Monsters can also help. These soft plushie toys are designed to help children express their worries. Ask your child to write a note or draw a picture of their worry and place it into the monster’s mouth. When they’re asleep, remove the note and in the morning, your child will notice that the monster’s eaten their worries. This should enable them to manage intrusive thoughts about death.

          

Let them get involved with the funeral

There are no set rules about children attending funerals. It’s up to each family to decide what’s best. However, if your child expresses a wish to go to the funeral or memorial service, you might want to consider letting them.

Funerals signify finality, which can help your child process the loss. Younger children may not understand what’s happening, but older children may take comfort from saying their goodbyes surrounded by their friends and family.

Remember, you’re not alone  

You never have to do any of this alone. At GreenAcres, we’re here to offer you all the support you need. Join us at one of our monthly Bereavement Groups or remembrance events to meet others who can relate to how you feel over a cup of tea and slice of cake. We promise you a warm welcome and friendly ear whenever you need it.

Hope Again is another excellent resource where young people can learn how to cope with grief and feel less alone. There’s lots of useful information, including personal stories, grieving guides and help for parents and guardians. Similarly, Child Bereavement UK offers an abundance of resources to help parents, guardians and carers support bereaved children and young people.

You can also head over to our blog for more resources on how to deal with loss – including what to do with ashes and what to do to a person’s social media account when they die.

 

When a loved one dies, there are many things to think about – like notifying friends and family, arranging the funeral and deciding what to do with the deceased’s ashes. However, one thing that’s less commonly considered is what happens to a person’s social media account when they die.

We understand that dealing with someone else’s social accounts can be overwhelming. It’s also unlikely to be at the top of your agenda. So this blog will explain your options and guide you through the process in simple steps. 

What happens to social media accounts after a death? 

After someone close to you dies, there are three main options available to you. Before you decide, check to see if your loved one left any specific instructions about what to do with their social media accounts. Otherwise, you can take action in one of these three ways:  

Delete their social media accounts

If you’re worried about your loved one’s accounts being hacked or don’t want people to be able to interact with them, you can delete them. Doing so will permanently remove photos, videos and information stored about them on social media.  

Deactivation is permanent, so be sure to save anything you want to keep before you proceed. It’s also wise to talk to family and friends before you do anything. They will need time to raise concerns, come to terms with your decision, or save any content they wish to keep.  

To close someone’s account , you’ll need:  

You may also be asked for further proof, but each social media platform will advise you of what they require to carry out an account deactivation before they begin the process. 

Turn their social media accounts into an online memorial 

For some, deleting a loved one’s social media accounts feels too final. Instead of removing their digital presence, you may prefer to turn their accounts into an online memorial for friends and family to remember them by.  

Doing this keeps their photos and videos intact. But it changes how the accounts work by preventing people from interacting with them. A memorialised profile also makes it clear to visitors that the person behind the profile has passed away. 

You may find that turning their accounts into an online memorial is a good way to help you and other friends and family grieve – at least in the immediate aftermath of a loved one’s death. You can always delete the accounts later on if leaving them online becomes too painful. 

You’ll need to bear in mind that the leading social media providers, including Facebook, Instagram or Twitter, handle memorial pages differently, and not all offer the option to memorialise them. Look at their help pages for in-depth help and information. 

Here are some helpful links to point you in the right direction: 

Contact Facebook and fill out the request to memorialise form.  

Contact Instagram to request to memorialise a deceased person’s account.  

Leave their social media as it is 

You don’t have to delete or memorialise your loved one’s social media accounts if you don’t want to. Instead, you can leave them as they are. Some people find comfort from interacting with the account and seeing it pop up on the feed every now and then.  

However, this isn’t for everyone. By leaving the accounts alone, automated features – such as birthday notifications and memories – will appear on their connected friends’ feeds. This can be upsetting to see, especially if the notifications appear unexpectedly or without warning. 

You may want to make people aware of the passing by tagging the deceased in a social media post. That way, friends and followers can hide the account if it’s too painful for them to see it.  

Get support with Life Ledger 

You don’t have to deal with any of this alone. Life Ledger’s free, easy-to-use service helps simplify the death notification process by contacting all businesses (including social media) connected to the deceased. You can keep track of the progress and upload any required documents from a single place, saving you hours of time and removing the need to have the same difficult conversations over and over.  

If you need support, contact our friendly and knowledgeable team for help and guidance through this tough time. 

Father’s Day is a time to celebrate dads and everything they mean to us. But if you’re suffering from the loss of a father or father figure, it can be an incredibly tough experience to go through.

memorial tree of father

For many people, a father or father figure may represent strength, stability, security and support. Maybe they were a great source of humour, joy or wisdom – a mentor and role model. The flip side of a father’s aura of strength and dependability means it might be hard to get close to him in an emotional sense. But whatever the nature of your relationship, a father figure is likely to have a huge impact on your life, shaping your choices and informing your character.

So, when a father dies, the hole that leaves in our lives can hollow us out and leave us feeling an enormous range of emotions. For some, that can vary from deep sadness to vulnerability, and even a sense of unfinished business, depending on the nature of our relationship and the circumstances of their passing. Father’s Day can bring old feelings back to the surface and amplify those that are already there.

GreenAcres is here to help. We understand how overwhelming Father’s Day can be, so this blog offers some advice on how you can cope.

Remember, your feelings are normal

People lose their loved ones in different phases of their lives and no matter how expected or unexpected the death is – it hurts.

When you’re grieving the loss of a father or father figure, your feelings are likely to change from one moment to the next. You may feel shock one day and anger the next – or you may experience these emotions within hours of each other. However you’re feeling, you must be kind to yourself and remember that this is completely normal.

Supressing these emotions and avoiding your grief is likely to prolong the pain. Embrace your feelings as best you can and try not to be too hard on yourself when you’re feeling particularly emotional around Father’s Day.

Find a fitting memorial

Living Memorial Tree
Living Memorial Tree

Sometimes finding the right memorial for your loved one can be soothing. Some people find peace in visiting the memorial, whether it’s just sitting nearby and reading a book, spending time keeping your memorial neat and tidy, or simply reflecting on happy memories. Talking can help too – whether you’re sharing what’s on your mind with your loved one or having a chat with someone else who is visiting or working at the Park.  

Everyone’s feelings, needs and wishes are unique, and everybody’s bereavement journey is different. Places like GreenAcres recognise this and support you to plan and create the perfect service, burial and lasting memorial for you and your family.

At GreenAcres, we can help you find the perfect memorial to your loved one. Our friendly and knowledgeable team are on hand to support you with creating a fitting tribute that you can visit and reflect on precious memories for years to come.

Revisit memories

Sometimes revisiting memories and talking about the person you’ve lost can help you along your bereavement journey.

You may find comfort from going through old photographs from when your dad was young. There are bound to be many parts of his life you didn’t know about, which can help you to understand more about his experiences and the life he lived. There’ll also be certain objects that evoke special memories of your dad, which you can keep and cherish forever.

It can also help to visit your dad’s grave or memorial on Father’s Day. While this is a personal choice, many people find comfort from visiting their loved one’s resting spot and tending to their grave – even if just for an hour or two.

Do something your dad would have loved

What better way to honour your dad’s memory than by doing something he loved when he was alive? Whether he enjoyed pottering in the garden, fishing by the lake, taking a walk through the woods or cooking a delicious meal, spending the day doing his favourite things is a lovely way to remember him as he was.

Share stories with loved ones

If you feel up to being around other people on Father’s Day, you may take comfort from sharing and hearing about stories involving your dad. Get together with those who knew him over a cup of tea and bring him to life through your collective memories. You may have turned your dad’s social media accounts into an online memorial. If so, you can share tributes on there and invite others to do the same.

Write a letter

If you find it hard to articulate your grief, particularly around Father’s Day, it can be a helpful and cathartic experience to write your feelings down in a letter to your father. You may find this helps bring you closer to your dad. It can also help you make sense of complex emotions, bringing a sense of peace and comfort to guide you through this difficult time.

If you long to be closer to your dad again, you could try reading out your letter to him, imagining he’s there with you. Tell him you’re with him and you love him. It may not work for everyone, but this process helps some people manage the pain of their loved one’s passing.

Seek help from a professional resource

It’s important to remember that you don’t have to deal with your grief alone. If you or someone you know is dealing with the loss of a father figure, here are some resources that might help you:

Sadly, men aren’t encouraged enough to talk about their mental health. As a result, they bottle up their feelings in order to cope. According to a report by Mind Men’s Mental Health, only two in five men admit to feeling worried or low, and are far less likely than women to seek support.

There are several organisations that can help provide support and guidance for those who are struggling following their father’s death. Men’s Sheds is one such movement. Men’s Sheds are community space for men to connect, converse and create together, reducing loneliness and isolation. There are 582 across the UK, so there’s bound to be one near you.

Supporting children through loss

Losing a father or father figure is hard for anyone, irrespective of their age. But if a father dies when his children are still young, this can add an additional layer of complexity to the emotions felt by those he leaves behind.

As well as dealing with the rawness of their grief when they lose their father. Children and young people are likely to go through the grieving process again and in different ways when Father’s Day approaches.   

It’s important for everyone involved to find the support they need to explore their emotions and cope with their grief during this difficult time. Thankfully, there are many resources that can help:

GreenAcres Bereavement Groups for support

When you lose someone, you love meeting others who can relate to how you feel can help. GreenAcres offer a kind, supportive space with understanding from others who are also living life after loss. Our Bereavement Groups take place monthly and are free for anyone to attend. You can find details of your local group by clicking here. You will receive a warm welcome from our experienced and compassionate team along with tea, coffee and cake!

Join us for our Father’s Day event

Father's Day Service at GreenAcres
Father’s Day Service at GreenAcres

Please join us in your nearest GreenAcres Park this Father’s Day, where we’ll be hosting a special service in remembrance of all the important men in our lives. Spend precious time together as a family to celebrate and remember the things you loved about your dad in a peaceful, quiet and reflective setting. Book onto a Father’s Day service to secure your place.

We also invite you to join us afterwards and have a Cuppa for Cruse in aid of their work that strives for everyone grieving to get the support they need, when they need it. 

Find out more about our Father’s Day event here.